We the hypocrites !!

Heights of hypocrisy : 

                              

   1. A being claimed to be both man and woman(Shiva),(worshiped ...but we hate gays/ lesbians/third sex.)....               

2  A 55 year old man( Prophet Muhammad)  marries a 9 year old girl(Ayesha)..he already had 13 wives at that time..(also worshiped ....but a female will be stoned to death if she is not loyal to his only husband )

                

 3   Mother of a son but still virgin( Mary)( what if every unmarried mother gives this excuse ?? I guess we will have lot of sons of God than)

P.S.: views are strictly personal...

the incidences which force u to think on religious lines

Today when i was watching the baba ramdev satyagrah on tv, i also came to know about what shah ruk khan and salman khan had to say about him. I also felt a odd when the fact that ramdev, just because he is a yoga guru,whatever he does necessarily be related to religion.Why ? is he asking you to stop polygamy ? Is he asking you to stop cow slaughter ? Is he asking your women not to wear burqa ? The only thing on his agenda was "corruption".Everybody seems to have forgotten the cause. Good for government though.
The ramdev issue diverted attention from Jan lok pall bill and now this communal thing will divert our attention from fight against corruption.
I like every Indian majority is sick and tired of minority appeasement. This is our history. We are very much medieval. Minority appeasement was a doctrine first by the English to divide us and rule.Now out governments are doing nothing better than that. They are only trying to find out new lines to divide people.Now on gender basis,age basis,rural urban ....the list is end less. They are trying to find out every possible natural or man made difference among individuals so that they can use it to their advantage.
The fight of religion and modernity is not new.The Europeans who project them self as epitome of rationality must not forget the period of dark age when Copernicus,gallelio  and many other scientists were killed just because they questioned the church.


One more thing I would like to point out here is the religion,the values etc etc...are always the burden of lower rung, eg Benajir bhutto,Sheikh Hasina, ruled the majority muslim countries.
In India for eg.Khap panchayat will kill the innocent poor couples but will worship sonia gandhi even if it was a inter-racial,inter-religion marriage.Nobody bothers about the moralities(if there are any) of Ambani's and Tata's. It is the middle class who forces the moral boundaries on itself.
  I don't believe in what all Karl Marx said but his view point about religion are for sure closest to my heart.
It indeed is a opium of masses which keeps them high.....a high which don't let them feel the real pain 

Love ...life...mind..heart...convictions... u ..friends ...and me...

Good news for me...after a long time.... I finally managed to pass a exam that included maths... aaaaaahhhh what a relief .... seriously maths scared the hell out of me....but this time i did well not because now I am a champion in maths but the reason was very simple : exam was easy :) ....Yes I am talking about my civil services prelims..


one more thing i noticed is your happiness is not completely filling if your loved one or someone very dear to you did not fair well . My happiness and euphoria of result was short lived first because  my very dear friend who was way more intelligent and hard working than me could not get through and secondly I passed this exam last year as well... crossing the same milestone again is not that great of a satisfaction..not for me at least.


I tried to search for happiness in some lost causes ....lol it looks funny now...when u meet someone very dear to you after a long long time....8 months to be specific...lots of ups and downs in between but the invisible string of love/care/affinity existed. It felt good...very good indeed.... it felt like all worries were gone...feeling of sort of bliss...m not sure it was bliss or some hormonal phenomenon because i do not know the difference between the two. The carnival went on for a day.....and then something happened...something which broke my deep convictions...something which took away what all i had at that time...
a complete sense of disbelief....a sense of emptiness.... something or should i say the only thing which i claimed to be mine was not mine anymore....it belonged to someone else...I remember my pledges of fighting with destiny  if it came in my way of getting it....i remember my anger for the world when it tried to tell me that i can not have what i want...everything was in front of my eyes...a movie was going on...
Loving someone is like raising a kid....you love the kid with all your heart...you do not see anything wrong or bad in it....it seems nature's best gift...but the difference between a kid and love is...
a kid grows ....but love changes...it need not grow...it may diminish ....my love diminished with time....lack of time...difference of priorities....and many more complications made it fade away...i wont say it died its natural death...but it died for sure....
For me it was like my mother calling someone else her daughter...it was like my father telling someone else that i love u aalu ...it was like zulu and nikhil calling someone else their didu ....
Of course I was in despair.... i needed someone.....someone who can make me believe all is going to be well....i met a very good friend of mine...she is always there....i m so thankful to God for my friends existence..
I came out of the shock wave....i realized that my friends are all what i need.....
God always sends a angel in my hour of need.....i feel lucky...i feel blessed...thank U God...lov u

Imagination land :)

great expectations :)

Nikhil (my younger brother) is in Kota. The place which gives us yearly harvest of the bestest engineers in town. He is obviously not having a good time there. He is not a geek and never have worked his ass off in studies in last 10 years, things are bound to be tough. 
He calls me everyday...sometime twice or thrice... firing all kind of questions...doubts ....etc etc....
During normal days its fine to give him funda's about how to manage time...how to remain emotionally stable...how to avoid the stupid prick friends... but sometimes when I myself feeling bad...down and out ...and he calls up....i feel " oh God" now what....
At times like these I have two options ... first is to give him a half hearted lecture....the clichéd principles and all what he already know ...and save my face this way.....second option : I tell him that Nik I will call you after some time....i ask for time because I want to tell him the things in which I truly believe. First I have to pump up myself....to get out of the sickening attitude...the miserable pathetic mental state which i had forced on myself.... because if tell him lies...if i tell him the things in which i don't believe,he soon will get that vibe...that didu is lying.


I feel its my moral responsibility to live the way i advise him to live.In this way it helps us both.I promise myself every time i talk to him that i will be the best sister in the world. I would give him every reason to believe that whenever he is in trouble he can call me and i also want his faith to be unbroken...i want him to believe that yes didu can help me out.
This  in turn gives me the strength to be strong..to move on....to know that sometimes you have to be the light house..u cant stop shining...u matter a lot more than u think...there are lot many reasons for u to move on.
Love u my crazy diamond...(nikhil) :) love you for broadening the meanings of my existence. Love you for giving me the strength unknowingly.
Thank u God...i love u ...and u know u love me too ....:) cheers...

Mean it when you say " IT DOES NOT MATTER"

I tried to sleep early today...my schedule these days is of a nocturnal....i sleep around 5am and wake up around 1pm.But of course could not sleep...as they say old(read bad) habits die hard. But never the less good amount of relaxation for body and mind.Sleeping would have been wonderful  but i actually could not do much about it.


While I was trying to sleep my head was so totally full of all kind of thoughts...my test..my test result..memories which i cherish...people whom i love and people whom i lost.I am no yoga guru I have no control what so ever on my thoughts..I simply could not ask my mind to stop...because i like doing this too...i give this bribe to myself that if i study for whole day and complete a target daily i will allow myself to taste the sweetness of memories....and to plan for future.Today it was a special treat because it is a weekend :) .My way of enjoyment.....more liberal i was in my thoughts and the hours to be spent.....although i never wanted this whole night to pass like this...but genuinely  i counted around thousand sheep but  sleep told me to FCUK OFF :P :D....


I was smiling when i thought of all the things which i wanted to do......like my name becoming a "noun"...how would i react when my name is there in the list( the same way a new actor in film industry plans her speech  after winning oscar in her very first movie)....whom all i will invite etc etc....of course main sochne me kabhi kanjusi nahi karti :P .....


certainly there had to be a guy.....(because whenever we girl imagine about our dream world...we are conditioned throughout our lives that it has to have a prince charming otherwise it cant be the dream world) and yes these days my prince charming is none other than Mr. A. felt good...when i was lost in his thoughts....memories were too less so the imaginary part was bound to be higher.....i wanted to go on a world tour.... :) 


suddenly the wicked part of my mind which was for some time sitting idle...came out with something phenomenal.... a simple question....enough to make me ponder over it for hours and then finally getting out of months long emotional honeymoon.
Question it asked was :  is it not  possible for u to put a limit to a open ended set ??..and moreover it is not sensible either...
well what it meant was there are so many things in this world about which i don't even know...there cant be a dearth of prince's in the world.....
All this is a question of  definitions....eg. A stone with a different definition becomes the much beloved diamond !!!!!  and further if we put some faith and love in it... it actually becomes THE GOD....
thats how things are.....thats how world changes..just with slightest of definitions and emotions...
So I changed the definition of my heaven....My heaven will now consist of the better version of myself and not the so called better half of mine....no I am not a half human .....and for sure i do not believe that somebody can compliment me better than my achievements. 


I stretched the things a little further...i was cribbing about being alone from so many days...all the people with whom i talk must have been frustrated because of these complains.....then i thought about the way God has created nature...
I thought about the strongest of creatures....A lion for eg...always stays alone.... does all his work alone...i guess it explains why he is THE KING and not some jackal.
I thought about the Eagle....it never moves in groups...its always alone....no wonder he rules the skies and not pigeons..


I finally decided to "say enough" to my admiration for some people.....yes you may be a demi God...yes you may be too good....yes you may be irresistible....you may be the best person i have ever met...but how does it matter ?? It actually does not matter my dear....now i have realized it.. and i will never allow this feeling to leave my head....
It made me feel so good and so light.....I cant lose myself for anyone...not at any cost....because it is I not world that matters.....