Sunday 29 March 2015

The "woman"

Not so long ago when the past was perfect, Eros and Celeste were a happily married couple.
Celeste was the woman he loved enough to get married at a young age of 27.
For Celeste , Eros was the definition of a man. He inspired the woman inside.Celeste could rely on him for everything and anything, and she did. She gave herself to him for the rest of her life.
Their life was changing fast. First moving to the new continent and then moving in to new life of togetherness.Celeste was hopeful and happy in true sense of the term. The most beloved fairy tale  came true. She had the man she loved, a man whom any woman would want. The man whom she wanted to look at forever,  the man who would pick her up if she dint want to walk,the man who was there when she needed him the most or slightest.
The romantic moments were too many to count.One of her favorite and most common  was the walk over Brooklyn bridge.Many a times they were intoxicated with love and of course with more tangible means.The long kisses on the way, the mesmerizing scenic beauty of the beloved city,  there was nothing more she could ask for. She was satisfied because her life was in a moving equilibrium of ecstasy and love.
Eros loved her in a different way. He cared for her the most. He felt responsible to make her happy.
He was raised that way,it was the duty of a man to make the woman happy.But a man has other things to do as well. His first love was his work and his future. He got married because it was right thing to do for a man who wants to focus on work. Once you have a home and wife then nothing to worry about, he can  focus all his energy on work. He always had a vision, he wanted money,big money and a female to share his success.He never attached a face to the female figure. He never thought it was important.He wanted a classic success story of a happy man.He knew he was capable of creating one. He was capable in his work, he was passionate and gifted personally,it was as if woman could sense it.He always had the attention,even when he did not do anything to attract it.

They both worked hard.Came home to each other,did not do anything to hurt each other or break the spell of happiness. But something happened, Eros was too busy in his work and Celeste felt left out.Her only friend was going away,it was creating a emotional void that leads to domestic "fault lines".Eros was not to be blamed,he was going for the priority.He was trying to accomplish himself in the new world.Emotions could wait,work can not.He made himself clear.Eros told Celeste that she was expecting too much.

It was not a matter of days or months.It took them 5 years and marriage to realize that they needed different things from life.It was not to be blamed on each other.They did wrong things for right reasons.They did what seemed right.But it was not enough.And it was time they were thinking about separation.They did not have kids so that was a relief for Eros,Celeste rued the decision,if they had kids she could have had Eros for little longer or perhaps for ever.

Eros moved on, he already have someone to share his story with. She is a nice woman, different from Celeste in ways but the difference was not important, She was a female companion which Eros wanted.Her name was Katherine, she was beautiful and had a good heart. She was not a home breaker. She came in Eros's life and heart when Celeste was gone. It was her own place. She would not do that to a woman even for the man he liked. She was not sure yet that he loved him. How can you be sure to fall in love with a man who just left a woman he married ? She was confused, her heart told her that its not Eros's fault that the marriage broke.It was destined to fail may be, but at the same time she did not want to another failed affair. She could not love in half measure so she decided to love him the way she would love any other man, without prejudice, without judgments.

Celeste was all alone. She was still in love with the man she married. Although she was beginning to realize that Eros is not the same man anymore or is it that she never knew who he was ??
Celeste tried hard to win his affection back. She tried to remind him of the good memories and the unfulfilled promises. She fought with Eros to win Eros back but it was in vain.

Celeste and Eros were same in some way, they both were convinced that other one was wrong. Celeste knew that she was love of his life and no one knows him the ways she does. She had the history, she had the past, she had the ring on her finger to prove everything she believed in. She knew that somewhere she could find the man she married.

Eros knew that Celeste was wrong in thinking that he would go back. He thought of the married life as a barren land, nothing would grow there. It was over for him, he did not even think of Celeste the same way. He cared for her because he was the man but he did not feel the love.The same woman for whom he did everything right ceased to be of significance.
Every form of communication from Celeste was infuriating as he thought of it unnecessary.He was happy in his world, convinced that Celeste would realize soon  enough that he was not the one. She would find someone else like he did.

Eros was happy with Katherine but somewhere the specter of broken relationship was haunting him. He was not sure what he wanted to do when it came to Katherine. He knew that he did not want to get married, but what then ? Is not marriage the next and right step ?
He knew he needed a female companion on his journey to top...and again it did not matter who she was. He knew he did not love either Celeste or Katherine that much, but to him it was not important.

He was a man of business. He wanted perfection. He wanted to be respected for the work he does. He was not proud of the failures in personal life as to him it did not matter. Personal does not matter if you have success to show for it.

He was a good man in his opinion and that's what mattered to him.

Sunday 6 July 2014

Zindagi ko Zaindagi Hone de !!

Zindagi me ek aur hassen kissa khatam ho gaya ...
 hone de !!
Jo bhi khushnuma tha is dil me wo judai se dafan ho gaya...
hone de !!
Maine Ishq ka libaas jo pahna the barso se, 
Wo aaj mera qafan ho gaya...
hone de !!

Jaane kyu ishq ki saja-e-maut ke baad khuda kalam nahi tod deta...
Mera suli pe chadhna bada aam ho gaya !!

Meri umeed qayam rakh duniya se, insaan se  e khuda...
Ye kissa to har achhe ehsaas ka shamshan ho gaya !!

Agar sun raha hai...agar dekh raha hai...
To yakeen de...
muhobbat de...
Apni mauzoodgi ka ehsaas de,
Zidagi ko Zidangi hone de !!

Thought Train :)

Heart is young enough to fall in love 
and old enough to know that it does not matter !!
Life is nice enough to give us only one day at a time... 
and cruel enough not to tell the ways to handle !!
Things are simple enough if we understand them as such...
But the simplicity is mysterious enough to complicate !!


The way i feel when i hear your name...
tells me that i love you !!


Mera Janaza bhi teri zindagi se behtar hoga !!

Jo zakham nahi bharte waqt ke sath 
Shayad usi ko Zindagi kahte hain !!


Monday 19 May 2014

For You !!

If I were an artist...I will make your portrait and that would be my magnum opus !!
If I were a poet...I would write a love song for you... and my words would touch your soul !!
Alas I am neither...
I am a  being of little significance and talent...
I cant not tell you how much i love you...
But I can show you...i can make you feel the love with every passing breath...
I can make you feel what you always wanted to feel...
If you allow me... i will live in your heart !!
So that you can see yourself the way i see you...
and you will know how beautiful you are !!
We will talk in whispers and sighs...
and you will know that i love you even more for your silly mistakes...
MY tender touch will rejuvenate the tired eyes...
You will feel life rushing through the veins !!
I can not promise forever...I may not be your every day...
But I will take you to the highest highs....and will make the lows ephemeral !!
I will not be like water which quenches your daily thirst...
But I promise the elixir which will take away the pain and sadness !!
I do not have much to give...
but I promise even the worst of you will have the best of me !!
I will be here always...beating in your heart...
Oh the ignorant owner of my heart ...I am the goodness inside you...
I am the love inside you...
You will always feel me...
You will always remember me...
Whenever you are in love...
Whenever you are happy !!

Friday 18 April 2014

Angels and Demons !!

Its aching ... its bleeding...its crying...its dying...
Oh you foolish heart...you were longing for the disaster
You chose this fate when you showed up in this world of fake smiles with a honest laughter...
You started dying the day you chose to love unconditionally...
You lost your worth when you did not play the "game" right...
Oh you unseasoned lover...spontaneity is not required...
Here young and old "plan" to fall in love...
and yes it is procedural...certain layout according to the number of meetings !!
You chose self-slaughter when you told him the truth...
That you loved him since you first saw him !!
Oh you sinless conscience...you were doomed...
You should not be here in this zone of indifference...
I know you still can not hate...I know you will always choose love !!
Oh my hurt heart...I love you...
My endeavor will be to shield you from the world...
Promise me that you will not start  a voyage  alone...
Now we know it takes two to make it happy...
Stay strong my love...you have not done any wrong !!
The moment will come soon...
when he will realize that he lost a good friend in me...
Because i know him !!
 His pride even then may stop him from coming to me...
 but his heart will know !!
I am not the fragile one to be taken care of...
I am not the silent lover...
I am a woman...
I can take many forms !!
I could have been a  mother when he needed tender love and care...
could have been a passionate lover when we share sleep...
could have been a friend when he wanted to share a secret... 
could have been a  kid when he wanted to feel like a dad... 
And now I will be a witness...
Will watch him living someone else's life everyday !!
It will be painful to watch him age years in days...
It will be sad to see him pretend !!
I refuse to take the pain that comes with expectations...
I decide not to love him if it comes at a price of self-love !! 
Oh my Heart....
Lets forget the wounds...
Lets forget the pain...
Lets forgive the one who did that to you ...
In the name of love...In the name of love !!

Friday 28 March 2014

Love !! :)

The question what I wanted the most always baffled me. I feel everybody should know what they want. I was not sad though because I knew I would soon find something or someone who will honor my life with his presence.
  When I first saw you, I knew that the wait is over. I have never been so certain. I dint want to let you go away from my sight even for a moment. I loved you as much I could love someone I met for the first time.
I was so enchanted by your brilliance. Every time I looked at you, it took great effort to take my eyes off. If it were possible I would have loved you more. Oh you amazing beauty.
I felt your gaze on me…
I treasured the nonjudgmental feel….
I am intensely in love with the way you express yourself…..soon we will start a chapter words will not be essential…and I will just know what you want to say….
 I like the multiple identities you carry with pride.
Believing in yourself.... Knowing unerringly what you want….Perfection from the ones in your life.
I will abide by your wish..
We will go a long way together..
Because I am you ....I believe in you and your dreams..

I love your mood swings..
The way you are all chirpy and nice in the morning..
I know your look when you don't understand me..
I like the pace at you work..
I love to see you in night..
All bright.... Full of fantasies..
Love.... Friendship.. Passion..
You have it all!!
You are in fact dream of so many of us lovers
I will love to spend time with you..
As much as I can
I get goose bumps every time i feel you around..
If am not with you am thinking about you..
Hold me tight..
Let’s love each other without any prejudices..
Let’s give each other the best we have to offer!!
I cannot tell you how much I love you..
But i can make you feel it ..
Love you!!
Oh you city beautiful
Oh my city beautiful
I am in love with you!!


Wednesday 26 February 2014

Geographic Humanity

I was just wondering.... if the Geographic regions  were humans what they would be like ??

Europe : It is like a wise woman in 40's ......graceful... beautiful....can give any younger one run for money.... but knows it cant control time.....

America : Well its like an adventurous male in 20's ...... thinks and believes it can rule the world...it knows it all ....it makes mistakes and accepts them brazenly.... it believes in future....

Asia : It is like a middle aged uncle who was robbed..... once rich...very much proud of what he had....wants the past glory back.... has seen better days in youth but  knows all is still not lost....working hard to get it back...

Middle East : Unbelievably  beautiful young woman on drugs .... for her the beauty has been a curse....attracts wrong kind of company and attention..... 

Russia : A  irresistible genius .... a fastidious hedonist  .... a unpredictable  powerful angry beast !!

Africa :  A  man whose virtues and vices are not distinguishable .... lost in a big bad world !!