Dikkat hai !!

Paidaish se pahle hi maa baap ko mere ladki hone se dikkat hai...
 Main 18 saal se kam hoon to mujhe apni choti umar aur allahdpan se dikkat hai ...
aur agar main 25 se jyada hoon to mujhe har wo cheej chahiye jo mujhe jawan dikha sake..
Agar mere physical dimension  aur proportion curvy nahi hain to main badkismat hoon...
mujhe push-up lingerie aur botox ki jarurat hai...
agar main thodi bhi bharma gayi hoon to maine jeene ka haq hi kho diya hai....
ab mujhe khana peena chod ke marne ke intejar ki jarurat hai
Bhagwan ne zulm kiya hai mujhe sanwla rang deke...
ab to mujhe apne chehre se aur har nazar jo mujhpe padti hai us se dikkat hai...
lekin agar kuch jyada gora bana diya to wo b koi baddua se kam nahi....
mujhe golden hone ke liye tanning ki jarurat hai..
Ab khoobsurat hona hi sab kuch nahi hota....
mujhe apne jaan pehchaan walo  ke mujhse ameer hone se dikkat hai
Oh aaj to main saj dhaj ke bahar nikli thi...
agar kisi badshakal gareeb ne ghoora mujhe to wo badtameej hai..
lekin agar stylish metrosexual dude  mujhe dekhe to wo tareef mujhe pasand hai ..
Mujhe inspire  nahi karti Kiran Bedi ki mehnat aur uska iconic hona...
par roadies  aur splits villa ka hissa na ban pana mere liye suicidal hai
Main kaun hoon ?? Main hoon bhi ki nahi hoon ?
Haan main aajkal hi har ladki me dikh jaati hu...
Haan main duniya ki soch hoon..
aur mujhe is soch se dikkat hai !!

Tijarat ya Ishq ?

Kal main khush thi..aaj nahi hoon..

fark sirf muhobbat ka hai...

kal tak sab kuch khubsurat tha duniya me....aaj kuch b nahi hai,

fark sirf tere na hone ka hai

waqt tha jab har shay ko faayde nuksaan me dekhti thi main b ....

aur aaj sab kuch kho ke b khush hone ka haq mile to kam lagta hai..

kisi mehtaab k liye apne  shams ko girwi rakh diya ..

zindagi ki kuch pal ki kadwahat kam karne k liye...

tujhse jhuthi khushi ka mitha zeher le liya 

apne aapse naraj is qadar thi ki khud se qabil tujhko maan liya 

koi mujhe be-waqoof tajir kahe to koi achha aashiq...

fark sirf lafzo ke fer ka hai....

main badal gayi hu teri pehchaan se pare....par tu waisa hi hai....

fark  mere insaan aur tera sirf ek yaad hone ka hai

aaj bhi apne aapko galat maan lene ki himmat nahi..

aaj bhi tujhe ek kamtar insaan maan lena zurm lagta hai

mamla ek padri ke kaafir hone ka hai 

ab tu hi bata ki main khud ko kya kahu....

ek tajir jise sauda karna bhi na aaya ...

ya fir ek aashiq jo muhobbat ne siwa kuch ni jaanta !!

Balance of tears and smiles !!!!!

With every drop of tear that comes in my eyes.....

some of which i shed in solitude ...and rest of them which are swallowed..

I curse the moments when i was not me....

With every memory that relates to you....

some of which make me feel loved...and most of which reminds me of a emotional fool that lived in me once...

I feel sorry for the heart that cried....

With every moment that passes without you....

some of which are not so happy ...and most of which are actually sad....

I feel that i can at least live without you ...if not happily....

With every passing breath that assures me of life...

some of which are habitual ...and most of which are actually sighs...

I feel you are going away...away till a point of no return....so far away that i wont be able to see you even with my eyes closed....not even in my dreams or nightmares....not even in recent or distant memories...not even in dark or light....not even in love or hatred....

soon you will become a known stranger....someone whom i knew i can never know....

soon you will become part of the world that does not know me...that does not belong to me...

because you will never try to come back....because you will never value the air..or water..or anything which u get without an effort.....

and that day i will be be happy...as happy as i can be.....just because after sometime I will realize that you were not the reason for my happiness... but I am....that nothing worth possessing can be possessed ....that its ok to shed few tears now as you are gone.... because you gave me few smiles when you were around !!!! :) :) 

My mark sheet....not good enough for the final list...but still...jaise b hain...apne karam hai :P :D

Missing parts of the puzzle !!

Kuch nahi h jiski kami hai 
 Jo h wo aisa nahi ki gair zaruri hai 
 Ek aisi neend mile jo mere bachpan ki yaadon me hai sirf
 Ek aisa din mile jisme sirf khushi hi ho mere har lamhe me 
Ek dost mile mujhe apne aap me jo kabhi mere sath tha  
Wo insaan jo ab kho gaya h ya pata nahi naraz hai mujhse 
Nahi chahti ki kuch asaan mile 
 Par koi jung mile jiska lakhsya bada ho Jise jeet ke main apna bhavishya ban paun 
Wo aakhen mile jo sapne dekhti h aur wo himmat mile ki unhe poora karun
 Wo shabd mile jo mera haal bayan kar paaye 
 Ya fir koi mile jo meri khamoshi samjhe 
Wo hawa mile jo aandhi banti h 
Wo lehar mile jo samandar ko hilati h 
Wo roshni mile jo chaunka de 
Wo pyaar mile jo poora kar de 
Wo dua qabool ho jo harsu maangti hu 
Wo bharosa mile ki mera hona apne sath hi kaafi h 
Wo shuruat mile jo ek nayi zindagi de 
Wo ant mile jo khushi de 
Wo khuda mile jo insaan ko samjhe  
Ya fir main Wo insaan banu jo khuda ka kiya sab sahi samjhe
 Is zindagi ki pahadi ko chadhte hue mehnat k chhale mile
 Har hissa mehnat se lahu luhan mile 
Jitne insaano ko de paaun khushi ki zindagi  Utni hi chain ki saans mile 
 Itna mushkil b nahi hoga in sab ka milna mujhe Agar mere khoye wazood mujhe tu mile !!

Shauq aur shikayat !!

Aankh ki nami se shikayat nahi .... Wajah bas munasib rakhna ..... Tanha rahne  se  darne ki zaroorat nahi ....  Isko bas tum apna shauq rakhna .... Har lamhe aur har insaan me umeed mumkin nahi.....  Bas tum khud se naumeed mat hona ....  Poori duniya tumhe khali lage kisi k bina... Kisi k na hone ki ahmiyat inti nahi hone dena... Ye jo tera man h wo sapne leta h.... Bas kisi  bebasi ko apne wazood ka hissa mat rakhna ..... Insaan h to fir kaam b waise hi kar .... Har baat pe kya aansu bahana aur kya aahen bharna ..... Zindagi hai to zindadili b ho .... Kyu apni maut se pahle apna matam rakhna... Hona hai to sabse umda ho.... Nahi hona aisa to fir jaldi ek bure kisse ki  tarah khatam ho !! 

You and I !! :) :)

I do not  love you for something you have in you ...I love you because I need to....
"tujhe pyaar karna meri us zarurat ka hissa hai jo mujhe insaan hone ka ehsaas karati hai ....
teri zarurat meri us zidd ka hissa hai jo ye kahti hai akele rah ke khush nahi raha jaata....
Na jaane fir tu kyun us duniya ka hissa hai jo meri nahi hai...
Main din ki aag hoon to tu raat ki thand hai...
Main andhvishwas hoon to tu Tark hai...
Main jaagte dimaag ki sochi samjhi soch  hoon aur tu gahri neend ka sapna hai ....
Main khushi ki chamak hoon aur tu aankh ki nami sa hai...
Main bhavishya ki ek uplabhdi hoon to tu ateet ki galti ka ek nishaan hai ...
Main tazurbe ki pahchaan hoon to tu bachpane ki misaal hai....
Tu wo sab hai jo main rah chuki ....Main wo sab hoon jo tu hone wala hai ....
Haan main pehchanti hoon tujhe...teri rag rag se waqif hoon...
Maine tujhe jeeya hai apne har beete din me..
Haan tum mujhe nahi pahchaan paa rahe ...
Kyunki main tumhara wo bhavishya hoon jisse tumhari har galti mit chuki hai....
Haan main tumhare chahe anchahe balidaano ka parinaam hoon....
Nahin main tumpe sharminda nahi hoon....
Agar tum aise na hote to main b aisi nahi hoti....galtiyan nahi karti to seekhti kaise ?
Tum jaise b ho mere ho....aur main khush hoon tumhe paakar...
Aur umeed hai mere ateet ki apne bhavishya se mil ke tum bhi apni muskurahat rok nahi paoge !!